Musings over a slice of sandwich

I tried out a new recipe. Ribbon Sandwich. My rating: 2/10.

It's actually three slices of bread with three different coatings. Tomato sauce, cheese/potato and coconut chutney. What went wrong? I ran out of tomato sauce and really didn't feel its taste. The potatoes was under boiled, the coconut chutney has less lemon and more salt and finally the bread just didn't toast. Let's just say not a very good start.

But its nice to eat something different :) May be next time I will make it better. InshaAllah (God Willingly).

Apart from that my studies are going up and down and left and right. My thesis on micro finance is yet to take off while my MA studies are still at writing skills. There there is the usual vocab and maths and reading of newspapers that crowds the life of a MBA. To remain on top. There is also a sense of 'Shouldn't I start attending interviews now?' and then there is just me who wants to sit back with a good game and have a ball.

So well with such crumbled thoughts I move on. My last post was a little sensitive that warranted calls from many asking me 'What happened' and from someone thinking it was the person 'How dare you write like this' haha... well, I had a heart to heart talk with the person and all air cleared out.

Therefore, don't worry.. chill madi. :)

Negative Comments

I have been blessed enough to have had positive people around me for a long time. Last four years? Before that I had a miserable time for a year because I had chosen to be with people who gave me pain. The last four years have been peaceful. I have discovered new friendships that have given me hope and faith.

Therefore, it pushed me off completely when I encountered a negative person. Well not negative person but negative thoughts and when I got thinking, I was like - Hey! Isn't the person itself bitter and angry at it's life? Some people expect you to live your life according to how they wish. B******! When my parents have given me enough respect and confidence to go ahead and live my own life why the h*** should any other Tom, Dick and Harry tell me stuff to make me feel bad!

What hurts more is when you have been close friends and have always looked towards each other for support and kind words that lift your spirit. When such a close friend makes snide and sarcastic remarks- it pinches the heart. A total stranger could say a thousand more mean and ugly stuff but that wouldn't hurt you as much as a remark by a dear one. Then you realise that this person who adored you unconditionally has actually started judging you. Human nature, you start judging back. My judgement was not a good one. Thinking of how the person behaves with it's people and how it's boast about itself and how perfectly organised and disciplined it is. I admit, I am ashamed of myself but I can't help it. Human vibes.

Therefore, the last two days were rather miserable in the company of a sarcasm machine. I have controlled myself to avoid a showdown. Now I know what is patience! and why the person who can control his anger- the strongest. What I need to work on is my facial expression. Neutral for all hurt, pain and anger. I don't know whether this entry makes sense or is even worth putting on my blog but it's a reminder for me that one day even your best friends can turn against you. This can be due to any difference of opinion or set of believes.

It is better not to have such people in life. Life may be lonely but at least it won't be miserable. Unless ofcourse, you have the patience to endure it and listen from one ear and throw it away from the other.

I'm a Spoilt Brat!

That is the realisation and brand identity that I have dawned to. Look at me- I live independently, eat whatever I want, sleep whenever I want, work as per my whims, have my own vehicle and a good set of friends that keep me happy. My relatives pamper me with sweets and calls to see that I am OK. I on the other hand sit back, stretch my lazy back and hug my teddy! (Though I am not the teddy hugging kind of girls but you have to admit it's heart warming to have a fluffy little thing and cuddle up with it)

I watch as this world goes by- I see men and women wake up early, finish off their chores, take the morning bus or ride their way to work in the horrendous Bangalore traffic, face a day with numbers or in front of the computer ranking their heads, others shout over the counters and keep dialing only to get an irritated 'I'm not interested!' BANG! While many of my gender members are busy from dawn to dusk cleaning and cooking and again cooking. Some like it, most of them do it mundanely as though they were born as machines with only that sole program.

Therefore, I consider myself super blessed that I don't have to face any of that - not yet at least. Today I am apne maan ki malika. However, there is stress. Life without stress is unimaginable. Being thankful is default for all the good things we have in life - but stress never leaves us. Some who are very busy suffer hypo tension and some like me Hypertension. Why is life so smooth?!
I know this entry hardly makes any sense. It's not supposed to. It's a thought creeping in my mind that found its way being typed and posted. But I now truly agree with my sister- I am a spoilt brat :)