Lailatul-Qadr

As the last ten days of Ramadan approach I can't help but wish that I return back to my childhood days. The days where we wouldn't fast but then we started fasting and started competing with each other as to how many fast one did.

It started with 15 when we were 7 years and then 18 and then 20 and then 22 and then all 30 by 11 years. On Eid, gifts would be given to children who fasted more than 20 fasts. Unlike one mulasaheb from India came and said that children are not obligated to fast and one should not entice them with gifts. He announced that 'those gifts' were given just like that. LOL well whatever. I think it was a real good habit of encouraging children to fast because once they come of age and they have to fast, it's nothing new. It's norm.

I also miss Laylatul-Qadr. Commomerated on the 23rd Night of Ramadan Kareem, we would hurry for iftar and there is a break of two hours where people get to rush back home, were their finest clothes, get their finest tasbhi and masala, women would gorge themselves with all the gold they have and children would show off their pretty new dresses. It was a fashion parade.

Later on as I grew up, I realised that Lailatul Qadr didn't start at 10.30 pm where all the faithful gathered to pray the whole night. It starts with the maghrib prayer, from sunset to sunrise!! we wasted precious moments from around 6.30 to 10.30 pm. Ok may until 8 its ok where you have prayers and iftar but the whole thing of going home to get 'Fancy Dressed' seemed material and irrelevant to me.

So I wore my 'best' dress at maghrib itself to be ready for the night of power. I would take my Quran Shareef and after Iftar, when people rushed home again, I sat in masjid or markas and read the Quran. I saved around 2 and 1/2 hours of worship.

Contrast this me to the 10 year old me. I used to look forward to Lailatul Qadr, the night the Holy Book of God was revealed, (and i never thought of it like that) I looked forward to my packet of imported chocolates and nuts and I looked forward to eating them all night long and to play with the other kids in the compound of the masjid. The Golden rule for the night was only one: DON'T FALL ASLEEP else you will not get the blessings.

I miss decorating the masjid after iftar before 10.30 pm when everyone would come. I miss the colorful paper and the Posters with Names of Allah, I miss twisting party paper and writing the surah Al-Qadr on the wall of Masjid. I miss all of us friends rushing to see how beautiful the masjid was decorated or competing that they ACTUALLY new how to read Surah-Al Qadr.

I miss those innocent days. When I was 5 and I slept coz I couldn't keep awake. But i boasted the next day that hey, i was awake till 2 am!! I miss not going to school the next day but sleeping and feeling all googy and foogy.

Yes, But most of all, I miss the innocence. I miss my state of mind and my state of heart that I had as a child. Where I knew who was my God and my Messenger and my present leader.

Where I did not read so much history of Islam or did not question some and trouble over some, where i was blissfully ignorant of life, of men, of greed, of calamities, of hardwork, of expectations, of responsibilities

and yes, of the importance of the Night of Power.

For it was days of fun, days looked forward to meeting friends in the masjid, of play, of prayers... and of chocolates till Eid.

For the adult me, is just too serious.